The wired world
keeps changing, so don't blink. Twenty years ago the equipment
for a mobile telephone had to be lugged around in a suitcase.
Now cell phones weigh ounces and fit easily into a pocket.
For the first time ever, the number of land phone lines
is decreasing while cells keep multiplying. Kids are early
adapters to new technology, so it isn't surprising that
over a quarter of teens now have cell phones.
As with all new technologies, there are benefits. Parents
like the idea that their kids can get in touch with them
in an emergency or just when they're not in sight. Kids
naturally love to be able to chat with friends and keep
up with everyone and everything.
Are there downsides? Oh, sure. Some kids have run up enormous
bills, disturbed classes with inopportune calls, and otherwise
trashed some common sense norms of etiquette. And there
is a growing problem of kids receiving bullying or threatening
text messages. I recently heard about a 15-year-old girl
who received 20 abusive messages in half an hour. She was
understandably badly shaken.
All parents will have to make a decision "to cell
or not to cell" based on circumstances and their child.
If your child does get a cell phone, these suggestions might
prove helpful.
Choose a plan that puts some reasonable limits on your
child's phone time. Make sure they know what the limits
are so they can do some budgeting.
Let your child know that the two of you will be reviewing
the bill together so you will have some idea of how the
phone is being used.
If use exceeds the plan limits, the charges can mount
very quickly. Make sure your child has some consequences,
financial or otherwise, if limits are exceeded.
Find out what the school's policies are regarding cell
phone use and let your child know that you will completely
support the school's standards.
Agree on some cell phone etiquette. For example, no
phone calling during meals or when it is bothersome or
rude to other people.
Ask your kids to let you know if they start getting
harassing phone calls or text messages. Even if you can't
track down the culprit you can help your child cope.
Conversely, let your children know that any "phone bullying"
will not be tolerated.
Let your child know that their use of the cell is contingent
on following the ground rules. No compliance, no cell.
Whether or not your child has a cell phone, it is important
to be aware of how mobile phones affect us. If we take a
few moments to consider how cell phones fit in our lives,
we can maximize the benefits and minimize the harm of this
new technology.
David Walsh, Ph.D. is the president and
founder of the National Institute on Media and the Family
(www.mediafamily.org).
He has written seven books and is a frequent guest on national
radio and television.
